Why I believe that all humans are capable of having an orgasmic experience, here’s how I did it by tracking pleasure and sensation
How many ways can you orgasm? No, it doesn’t have to be a competition of clitoral, g-spot, a-spot, anal, cervical, or anything else. What about orgasmic experiences that DON’T focus on your genitals?
If you struggle to have an orgasm and feel hopeless, read on about how you can create an orgasmic experience out of anything. Maybe you actually CAN orgasm after all?
We are in heavy packing mode here, as we are leaving for Vienna Austria next week OH MY GOD ARRGHHHHH!
But don’t worry, all my work will continue as usual.
We can still work together, be it 1:1, group programs, workshops, or just following my content, the Zoom background will just be different and my Instagram feed will contain more shots of apple strudel and gorgeous architecture.
As we’ve been in packing mode, one of the big things I’ve been packing up has been my books.
So. Many. Books.
Are you a bookworm too?
My sexuality books, obviously. I am in the process of updating my recommended reading list for you.
Books on business and entrepreneurship, counselling, coaching, spirituality, trauma, cooking, and fiction books too.
As I got to the bottom, I found my stash of languages books.
French and Spanish grammar books, verb tables, vocabulary books, books on swearing, how to break out of beginners’ Spanish.
You may not know this unless you’ve known me for years, but I have always LOVVVVEDDD languages.
Ever since I was a teenager and I was the teacher’s pet in the front row of class always raising her hand who knew all the answers.
To taking them up again as a young adult, becoming fluent in both French and Spanish, and starting a languages degree.
It sounds very UN-British to absolutely adore language learning. (Well, I did marry a German, after all).
It gives me a thrill. It’s like decoding something, and I feel tingles all up and down my body.
I have this wonderful quirk where learning verb tables actually gives me incredible pleasure and satisfaction.
Yes, I’m a nerd, and bloody proud of it too.
As I flicked through one of the grammar books and looked at my old writing, I felt a surge of emotion and sensation.
Joy, nostalgia, thrill.
You could say it’s past memories, but it was more than that.
Just like I tell my clients to do as I absolutely practise what I preach (imperfectly and messily), I tracked the pleasurable sensation as it came up and let myself enjoy it.
It started in my belly and moved down to my womb area and up to my heart. It felt tingly, buzzy, and glowy.
It felt like a little implosion of pleasure. My throat twitched. A feeling of groaning.
Almost like an orgasm? Yes, very much like an orgasm.
THIS, right here, was an orgasmic and/or ecstatic experience, A la Barbara Carrellas and Urban Tantra.
It was an orgasmic and ecstatic experience with no genital stimulation or even sexual stimuli at all.
The same build up, pleasure, and release as if I had been in bed with a vibrator or a glass wand, just not located in my genitals this time.
All I did was track the pleasurable sensations that I let myself then enjoy, while sitting on my living room floor, surrounded by boxes and cat fur, wearing a hoodie.
Before you think, “Yeah well, it’s easy for YOU, Lucy, you’re a sexologist who probably has multiple orgasms weekly”.
No, not particularly.
Maybe she’s born with it, or maybe it’s just years of practice…?
Despite what you may think, I wasn’t born with a gift of being able to cum with the flick of a wrist, nor am I uniquely blessed by the Sex Goddess of Holy Cunt or whatever that gives me supernatural sex powers that other poor sods can’t have.
What I HAVE had is had years of practice at this, being in the right environments for it to take place, and it could be the way that my own neurodivergance works too, whereby I am very sensitive to sensations in general.
I consider myself a highly sensory person, who is capable of experiencing intense pleasure and can also easily get overwhelmed too.
Autism does have its perks, you know.
The point is, that orgasmic sensations and experiences are EVERYWHERE if you learn to attune to them.
And crucially, tell yourself you are allowed to enjoy them.
Follow them. Savour them. Drink them in.
I learned this in the world of tantra and conscious sexuality, where you train yourself to focus on pleasurable sensations and amplify them.
Reframing pleasurable feelings and sensations as sacred and a path to the divine or whatever you want to call it.
I believe ALL humans are capable of having orgasmic experiences, it’s hardwired into us.
With clients and in the e-course, Orgasmic Liberation, I invite you to take an inventory of all your current orgasmic and ecstatic experiences that aren’t necessarily sexual.
Then we can build on that.
Learning to orgasm is just practise, retraining our bodies, brains, and nervous systems to respond to pleasure.
Now do you think you can’t orgasm?
I don’t think so.
Want more?
1. You can purchase the e-course, Orgasmic Liberation.
For women and vulva havers only, this course gives you the practical tools and skills you have your first orgasm. Or multiple. Or more.
This is the digital, self-paced version of the group program we just concluded a few weeks ago.
Access this in your own time and pace, a one-time purchase of £147, through a secure Stripe link. All you do is enter your card details once, then you are emailed with the login details to the portal with the e-course.
Have your first orgasm right here
2. Let’s work together 1:1
Want more intimate, personalized support? Want to uplevel your sex life, experience pleasure you never thought you were capable of having, and feel like an equal partner in the bedroom?
You and me, for 6 months, for highly driven, smart, soulful, and passionate women and vulva havers who are ready to do this work.
Often they come to me wanting to have more sex and better sex– and they leave receiving so, so, so much more.
If it sounds good to you, you can fill out the application form to apply for a free chemistry call by Zoom. If we are both feeling a, “yes”, then we start work ASAP while the ball is still rolling and your motivation is high.
Lucy Rowett, CSC – Pronouns: She/Her/Her