If you’re a woman or vulva owner who struggles to enjoy sex, read this.
Before we talk about trying another vibrator or buying some new lingerie (which are both awesome too!), we need to go right back to basics.
If you’re familiar with subconscious programming and know that our childhood and upbringing affect us as adults, you’ll understand.
As women and those of us socialized as women, we are only taught to think about sex within the context of a relationship or marriage, NEVER for ourselves.
Don’t “put out”. Don’t get pregnant. Don’t be a slut. Don’t be a prude. Satisfy your man. Don’t sleep with somebody on a first date. How to give an amazing blowjob.
You were likely never taught or encouraged to explore your own sexuality and erose as a young person, or even as an adult today.
So sex feels like something you have to “give” to your partner.
Then throw in some religious conditioning and Purity Culture if you had that, and it’s a perfect storm of confusion, shame, and more confusion.
You were never encouraged to say YES or to want anything in the first place
This means that when sex becomes something that you feel is taken from you, something you have to give, something that you do to keep your partner happy, or something that you can’t actually explore for yourself, you feel frustrated.
The distance between you and your partner gets wider.
They reach out. You pull back. You reach out. They pull back.
It becomes an unwinnable game of cat and mouse, where you shrink when they touch you.
Or you zone out and struggle to say anything.
Or you try things half heartedly, but not with a lot of enthusiasm.
This can change.
What if you felt your sexuality as your life force?
As something delicious, fun, and expansive that is as much part of you as your other passions?
What if you felt just as comfortable asking for your partner to go down on you and stay there, as you do asking them to buy extra carrots at Tesco?
What if you could write out a delicious erotic story where you get to have everything you want, and share it with your partner?
So many delicious possibilities, and they can be yours.
The Shameless Woman Immersion is a 6 month experience for creative, highly driven women and vulva owners to dive into your own sexuality so you can create a new kind of intimacy with your partner and yourself.
Because you are a sexual and erotic being right until your last dying breath, so why not create a second spring in your life?
See you inside? Click here to apply.
Love,
Lucy x
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Want specialized support to embrace pleasure, your authentic sexual self, and releasing sexual shame to create connected relationships? Learn more about how you can work with me here.
Download your free audio training on sexual communication.
Buy my e-book, Rekindle The Sexy Spark in Your Relationship.
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Lucy Rowett, CSC – Pronouns: She/Her/Her